The last couple of weeks have been brutal because of Thanksgiving break. The instructors were forced to cram four days worth of lectures into two and its clear many students are feeling stretched thin and bitter towards Vue.js and the timing of those Plymouth colonists. Couldn't they have just waited a few weeks?
We've spent the last three months attempting to appease angry machines. Hours staring down angry red lines and making meager offerings until someone eventually murmurs, "Oh, I think it liked that..." and we're blessed with part of a working program.
Perhaps that is why the final day of lecture was my breaking point. We did a review and I got lost almost immediately. Eventually, I turned off my camera and cried. Evidently, I was not very subtle and was quickly joined by my husband and cat who both made several well-intentioned bids at cheering me up. I'll let you guess which one offered to take me out for tacos.
I insisted on staying put for the rest of the review and penned a depressing message to Brian and Rachelle during one of the breaks about my lack of understanding and fear of the future. I suppose that is one of my strong points: total transparency to the point of idiocy.
Just kidding about the idiocy part, but I do dislike dishonesty and posturing. My hope is readers can infer from the rest of my blog that I will tell the truth even if it could potentially make me look weak to others. I want to give people a genuine look at what it's like participating in a coding bootcamp and if I were to pretend it was all easy, that would be deception and unhelpful to those who may be deciding whether or not to enroll.
In an episode of What We Do in the Shadows, Nadja mentions some vampires who failed at hosting an event and permanently transformed themselves into "bats full of shame." I relate to this concept so much, that's the name of my mobile hotspot. While I am unable to transform into a bat, I am really great at sulking/dramatic makeup.
Anyway, after some encouraging messages from my instructors and reaching out to classmates who felt similarly, I was able to shake off the depression and get excited for the final capstone kickoff on Friday. The tacos helped, too. ;)
The entire cohort gathered over Zoom for the final capstone kickoff. A week prior we were given a review of the potential projects and instructed to submit a list of our top three. John, one of the .NET instructors announced the teams, projects, and expectations.
A lot of people were nervous because while the instructors try to honor your choices, sometimes it's not possible. I think imposter syndrome gets a lot of people down and they fear working with unfamiliar people because they don't want to be seen as dead weight. I know that thought crossed my mind a few times, but I got lucky and I'm working with people that I typically do homework with.
We graduate on December 18th. We will have a virtual ceremony and demonstration expo.
No comments:
Post a Comment